Memoirs are hot. Whether it be one of the dozens of juicy celebrity memoirs that come out each year (hello, Prince Harry and Britney Spears) or a post-career reckoning from an influential political figure, memoirs will never not be popular reading. After all, what’s the best way to extend a career that may be past its original prime? Write about it, of course!
Memoirs aren’t just for those of us who are well-known or notorious, however. People from all walks of life write their memoirs, and several are successful in their own right. “Crying in H-Mart” and “Educated” are two recent memoirs written by Michelle Zauner and Tara Westover, respectively. These books are examples of best-sellers that catapulted their authors to previously unimagined career heights. Zauner is the lead singer of a moderately successful band and Westover had a PhD from Trinity College Cambridge, but they are now best known for the books they wrote about their lives.
The memoir is a genre in which all types of stories can unfold. If you’ve been wanting to write your own life story but aren’t sure where to start, here are our ten tips to get going and share your story with your readers.
Bonnie Book’s 10 Tips for Writing Your Life Story
- Define the message of your story.
Life is not linear, and it can be difficult to put a narrative around the interconnected web of your experiences and emotions. To help with this, define your central message. Think of this as the thesis of your story. What is it that you have to offer the world, and how will others connect to your unique life experiences?
- Freewrite at first – the narrative shape will come with time.
If you’re feeling stuck, freewriting is a great tool to get you out of the slump. This doesn’t always mean just sitting down and writing whatever comes to mind. You can give yourself a question or a scenario – “What was my greatest fear as a child” or “What did it look like when I knew what I wanted to do with my life?” – and start there. You might be surprised where it will lead you.
- Outline chapters before starting.
An outline is an evergreen document, which means that it can change whenever you need it too. It also serves as the backbone of your life story, giving you structure to keep moving through the difficult parts of writing your book. If it suits you, start with your outline. When the writing gets tough (and it will) you’ll be more empowered to push through because you’ll know where you’re going.
- Include several types of writing.
Your memoir is your story, which means it can look, sound and feel exactly how you want it to. If you want to include other types of writing in your story, do it! Our clients have included their poetry, journal entries, even fictional scenarios in their memoirs. If it works within your life story, it can work within your memoir, too.
- Interview people who know you.
You don’t live in a bubble, and it’s not helpful to write your story in a bubble, either. Take the time to talk to the people around you about their memories and recollections of your time together. If they’re a part of your life story, talk to them about their version of events. It will only add depth to the stories you’ve told.
- Delve into your family history.
Even if you don’t end up including much of it in your memoir, having the context of your family history is a great way to understand yourself and the world you grew up in better. Read journals, ask surviving family members, or find documents online to help you understand your family.
- Revisit journals.
If you’re writing your life story, chances are you’re predisposed to record it already . If you have old journals, notebooks or even class assignments, look through all of it. It can put you back in the mindset of who you were and what you were experiencing. Plus, it might jog other memories that you had forgotten about.
- Don’t shy away from dialogue
The best memoirs always feel specific and read like fiction. One of the best ways to achieve this effect is to bring your readers into the scenes of your life. Recreate conversations to the best of your ability, and know that you don’t have to remember them perfectly in order to write them down. Dialogue is an important element of any book and this applies to your memoir, too.
- Experiment with form
Your life story may not feel linear, no matter how much you try to contextualize it this way. If that’s the case, it might be time for you to experiment with form. Maybe non-linear essays are better for your story, or a collection of your poetry. However you prefer to write your story, keep in mind that there is no wrong way to do it.
- Include historical or current context
As stated above, your life isn’t happening in a bubble. Understanding your life better may require you to understand the world in which you grew up, too. What was happening politically or socially? What ideologies or institutions were you raised with, and how did they affect the way you approached the world? As you work to understand these elements, you may be surprised that seemingly disparate elements of your story start to make more sense.
